If you aren’t Canadian, you might not know this: there is currently a Stanley Cup™ championship going on. But as most of our readers are Canadian, I have no doubt that when you aren’t refreshing the Republic of Bacon in your browser window, you have planted yourself in front of your TV where you can eat bacon and support the team of your choice. (Not casting any judgements, but it’s probably not that patriotic to support Boston…) So as to help you through those long, boring days between games, I’ve decided to assemble the most bacony hockey Internet information available. Enjoy all of the glorious hockeyness after the break. Oh, and go Canucks!
Why the Canucks Are Like Bacon
Jacqueline Twa tries to give us some reasons why the Canucks are like bacon:
Have you ever been walking down a hallway and caught the whiff of the tantalizing smell of the world’s best carnivorous delight being fried? It’s almost as if you can already taste the crispy, salty goodness – you can imagine the taste, feel the thrill, live the moment. That’s how it is right now with the Vancouver Canucks. We can taste the victory, smell the Stanley Cup, live the dream before it happens.
Her logic is a little shaky – it kinda sounds like the Stanley Cup is what is bacon-like – but Twa does give us excellent advice on baking the best bacon. So, for that, and her understandable enthusiasm, we’ll give her a free pass.
Magic Hockey Bacon
Back in 2009, a Boston Bruins fan claimed to be able to affect the winning abilities of his team by placing an offering of bacon before his TV when it featured a game. He hasn’t provided any updates about hockey this Stanley Cup season – and he appears to be in Belize – but I might recommend similar magic for any Canucks fans out there. Hey, eating bacon before a Cup game: it couldn’t hurt.
Hockey Bacon Twitter
As Hockey Bacon says:
I believe it was Socrates that said a life without hockey and bacon is not worth living.
(Presumably it was field hockey, or Ancient Greece was a lot colder than those togas would indicate.) If you follow the Hockey Bacon Twitter account, you can keep up with all of their latest hockey tweets. Or you can just follow some guy called Hockey Bacon for the hoo-hahs. I’m not a judgey-type person.
Canadian Bacon Hockey Brawl
Sort of related – well, not entirely. In the movie Canadian Bacon, several Americans – led by John Candy – get into a brawl at a hockey match for insulting Canadian beer. This doesn’t seem like a very realistic scene, because clearly all Americans know that their beer is of a much more inferior quality. I mean, really. No one would be that dumb to prefer American beer.
Bacon Stanley Cup
It isn’t a Stanley Cup championship without a posting of the ceremonial bacon Stanley Cup. Just as lusted after by any true-blooded Canadian as the real Stanley Cup, but 100% more edible.